ELWOOD COMICS

BEFORE MOVING ON, PLEASE NOTE THAT WHEN I DID THIS IT WAS A VERY VERY VERY SLOW DAY AT WORK..AND I DO BELIVE I WAS ON SOME KIND OF PAINKILLER.

This week we find our HERO, HERO and his sidekick Pancho trapped in the lair of the EVIL Von Smallhausen. Hero’s Side kick pancho will be played by DANNY DEVITO
Pancho: Gad Zooks Hero, how will we get out of here this time? (looks afraid)
The part of the HERO (me) will be played by DENZEL WASHINGTON
Hero: Fret not my little pancho, I have been in tighter spots before(arms akimbo) Von Smallhausen will not be able to hold me down much longer!(point to the sky, and thrust square joy out)
The part of von smallhausen will be played by the guy that acted as him in ALLO! ALLO!
Von Smallhausen: Zieg! Heil! I have you in my evil clutches now, Hero…(cue dramatic music..) You are your little pancho will not leave this place ALIVE(in a suitably inaccurate yet menacing accent)
Pancho: oh…oh…I will never see Daisy, my pet buffalo again…oh..Daisy whatever will you do without me….(sobbing)
Hero: Well Von Smallhausen, you may think you have me but I would advise you to think again
Von Smallhausen: MUAHAHAHAH MUAHAHAHHA MUAHAHHAHA burp!! Excuse me. No it is you who should think again! You and your little friend will die a slow and painful death! Did you watch that Hannibal Lector scene where the pigs ate the people!!
Pancho: GASP!
Von Smallhausen: yes Pancho I can see by your eyes you have seen it! Well you know what happened to them don’t we!
Pancho: Oh Hero! It was horrible! The horror the horror!
Hero: Do not worry, Pancho I have dealt with man-eating pigs before!
Von Smallhausen: erm um hmm ahem..well I was not able to obtain man eating pigs…..(look sheepish) but I did get… 50 very hungry guinea pigs! Muahahah muahahah muahahaha burp..
Hero: NO NOT GUINEA PIGS!!!!!!!
WILL OUR HERO AND HIS FAITHFUL SIDEKICK ESCAPE THE EVIL CLUTCHES OF VON SMALLHAUSEN, TUNE IN NEXT TIME!(CUE CREDITS)