For one so small,you seem so strong My arms will hold you keep you safe and warm This bond between us can’t be broken I will be here don’t you cry----Phil Collins
2/09/2009
2/08/2009
2/07/2009
2/06/2009
Solitary Drifting.
solitary drifing.
from this place or that
always moving like a cheshire cat
never bogged down by life or love
my home is the big wide earth
solitary drifing.
I seek to be, a ghostly condition.
not staying long never leaving an impression.
you think you know me but all you see
is a grinning cat happy to be free.
from this place or that
always moving like a cheshire cat
never bogged down by life or love
my home is the big wide earth
solitary drifing.
I seek to be, a ghostly condition.
not staying long never leaving an impression.
you think you know me but all you see
is a grinning cat happy to be free.
2/02/2009
nostalgia in green
nostalgia describes a longing for the past, often in idealized form.
By nature i find it easier to look back rather then foward, its how i am built. I find comfort in the past, its what I know. The future to me is always a dark void where anything can go wrong, where i have no control but the past? heh thats my playground.
I went back for a day of reservist today, well half a day. While it wasnt the first time i had been back to stagmont camp since i left the army all those years ago, i was and am filled with the knowledge that my time as a reservist is running out (idealized lol) and soon the places i roamed as a young soldier will no longer be there for me to go and reminisce. Today i took it all in, i watched the young men running around the parade square looking busy, i saw boys cleaning their equipment where i used to, i saw young privates sitting on the same spot i sat.
Was i ever that young, was i ever that gung ho, did i think i was going to change the world or save it? Did i think that my small role in the military machine would make a difference that would be spoken of for all time. Probably lol but i was always an optimistic sort of fellow
In the cab on the way to camp i was stuck not for the first time by the differences that surround the camp, new schools new buildings all is different on stagmont hill.
I remember my father dropping me off at the gate or my bil driving me back to camp on a sunday night. I remeber that feeling, that lil sense of depression in your belly we call "book in blues" it lasted till you got to your bunk. I remember my buddies some of whom i was with throughout my 2 years in the army, none of whom i have seen since the day i left. I regret that. We went through so many shared experiences, a couple of trips to Taiwan(including a brawl at taipei's hard rock cafe that required our slipping out before the cops got there), Philipines(where our vehicle was stonned and snipers watched our every move on the runway at the airport) god knows how many nights in the field oh those nights in the field..its never like the movies its always raining its always hot you never know where your going but you have to hurry to get there. In Taiwan we used to sit on the roof top at night and talk about what we wanted from life, what we wanted to do, our hopes and our dreams the 5 of us were nothing alike but we were the same. I'll never forget the last few nights i spent in the army, none of us could sleep, but none of us could talk we knew we wanted it to end but we new it would be the end of what we had. My friend Lim Boon Chiong would smoke like a chimney, my buddy Tan Kar Lin a vegetarian (i could not convert him no matter what) would sit back and just stare out at the sky, i would pace up and down with lots of heavy sighing much to the annoyance of wong yuet kai (the duck eater we called him) and tay(would was scared to speak cause lim told him if he said anything he would die lol) on our last day we said nothing we all started to talk but in the end hugs were exchanged and in a nice bit of fun we saluted each other and silently went on with our lives.
It felt strange walking past the chin up bars (that hated implement of modern torture) across the parade sqaure and noticing for the first time that they had chopped down the big trees in front of what was my bunk .The chilly wind would brush the leaves against the windows at night and in the morning before dawn when the air was cool and sleep was pleasurable you would be awoken by the cries of thousands of crows as they awoke from ther slumber in the treetops, this would always be followed by a cacophony of curses (some of which till this day i know not the meaning).
I wish i had written down, all i had done in those days i wish i had kept in touch with my kaki i wish i knew then what i know now, if i had i would not have been so wary about the future.
By nature i find it easier to look back rather then foward, its how i am built. I find comfort in the past, its what I know. The future to me is always a dark void where anything can go wrong, where i have no control but the past? heh thats my playground.
I went back for a day of reservist today, well half a day. While it wasnt the first time i had been back to stagmont camp since i left the army all those years ago, i was and am filled with the knowledge that my time as a reservist is running out (idealized lol) and soon the places i roamed as a young soldier will no longer be there for me to go and reminisce. Today i took it all in, i watched the young men running around the parade square looking busy, i saw boys cleaning their equipment where i used to, i saw young privates sitting on the same spot i sat.
Was i ever that young, was i ever that gung ho, did i think i was going to change the world or save it? Did i think that my small role in the military machine would make a difference that would be spoken of for all time. Probably lol but i was always an optimistic sort of fellow
In the cab on the way to camp i was stuck not for the first time by the differences that surround the camp, new schools new buildings all is different on stagmont hill.
I remember my father dropping me off at the gate or my bil driving me back to camp on a sunday night. I remeber that feeling, that lil sense of depression in your belly we call "book in blues" it lasted till you got to your bunk. I remember my buddies some of whom i was with throughout my 2 years in the army, none of whom i have seen since the day i left. I regret that. We went through so many shared experiences, a couple of trips to Taiwan(including a brawl at taipei's hard rock cafe that required our slipping out before the cops got there), Philipines(where our vehicle was stonned and snipers watched our every move on the runway at the airport) god knows how many nights in the field oh those nights in the field..its never like the movies its always raining its always hot you never know where your going but you have to hurry to get there. In Taiwan we used to sit on the roof top at night and talk about what we wanted from life, what we wanted to do, our hopes and our dreams the 5 of us were nothing alike but we were the same. I'll never forget the last few nights i spent in the army, none of us could sleep, but none of us could talk we knew we wanted it to end but we new it would be the end of what we had. My friend Lim Boon Chiong would smoke like a chimney, my buddy Tan Kar Lin a vegetarian (i could not convert him no matter what) would sit back and just stare out at the sky, i would pace up and down with lots of heavy sighing much to the annoyance of wong yuet kai (the duck eater we called him) and tay(would was scared to speak cause lim told him if he said anything he would die lol) on our last day we said nothing we all started to talk but in the end hugs were exchanged and in a nice bit of fun we saluted each other and silently went on with our lives.
It felt strange walking past the chin up bars (that hated implement of modern torture) across the parade sqaure and noticing for the first time that they had chopped down the big trees in front of what was my bunk .The chilly wind would brush the leaves against the windows at night and in the morning before dawn when the air was cool and sleep was pleasurable you would be awoken by the cries of thousands of crows as they awoke from ther slumber in the treetops, this would always be followed by a cacophony of curses (some of which till this day i know not the meaning).
I wish i had written down, all i had done in those days i wish i had kept in touch with my kaki i wish i knew then what i know now, if i had i would not have been so wary about the future.
1/28/2009
1/11/2009
1/03/2009
12/09/2008
12/01/2008
Untitled.
We'd be talking about trees,
lights and breakfast,
about toys, gifts and another great christmas
we would gather together to winge and whine
about this that or the other
we'd be we laughing and annyoing mostly
one another.
We'd tell tails of yore,
ancient and true, of bravado both
false and true.
It gets easier they say, but i doubt this is
true. It seems harder not being able to say
"merry christmas" to you
lights and breakfast,
about toys, gifts and another great christmas
we would gather together to winge and whine
about this that or the other
we'd be we laughing and annyoing mostly
one another.
We'd tell tails of yore,
ancient and true, of bravado both
false and true.
It gets easier they say, but i doubt this is
true. It seems harder not being able to say
"merry christmas" to you
11/19/2008
15th Nov. 5 years on
This past weekend was our 5th wedding anniversary. It seems just yesterday we were sorting out our wedding and the house and the next thing you know, we got a dog followed by a baby!
On the spur of the moment, and i do mean the spur of the moment we decided to book a room at the Siloso Beach Reasort, our wedding dinner was on sentosa as well. Anway the room was rather pleasent, the hotel is pretty nice and there are really making an effort with the service . Its smack in front of Cafe Del Mar on Siloso beach but our room was set further back so we were not disturbed by the music at all. Our original plan called for us to have a simple dinner in town so after loitering in our room for abit we went for a nice japanese dinner.
All in all a lovely day, aside from the fact that i had to work in the morning.
On the spur of the moment, and i do mean the spur of the moment we decided to book a room at the Siloso Beach Reasort, our wedding dinner was on sentosa as well. Anway the room was rather pleasent, the hotel is pretty nice and there are really making an effort with the service . Its smack in front of Cafe Del Mar on Siloso beach but our room was set further back so we were not disturbed by the music at all. Our original plan called for us to have a simple dinner in town so after loitering in our room for abit we went for a nice japanese dinner.
All in all a lovely day, aside from the fact that i had to work in the morning.
11/17/2008
how time flies
you know what i notice when i look at this picture? the hi fi set in the back ground. the red flowered plate on the table(mummy still has those) The green dish and the metal cups...near the curtains the little horse pulling the the jug..oh the cupboard and the terrazo floor.
Labels:
family
11/16/2008
11/11/2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)